The collaborative process is not only for divorce.  It is a process by which disputing people can explore common interests, weigh options, and come up with a criteria that helps them weigh those options ffor the most benenfit for everyone.  Arguing rarely changes peoples' postions.  What  the collaborative process does is keep down the emotional cost of conflict, but still allows each person to reach an agreement that is workable.

 Keep your dignity in your dispute.  You are bigger than this one problem.